REMEMBERING SUMMER and POLIO

These hot humid days, a little early I may say, bring to mind and to feelings, lethargy, disappointment, pain, and overheating, and a sense of non-belonging.
There is a new book coming out in August by Julie Silver of Harvard Medical School. She has been a great advocate of those of us who had Polio back in the 40's and 50's. This book is a compilation of stories of polio victims. She felt that these voices needed to be heard before the world forgot about polio and Post-Polio Syndrome. I find it admirable that she wrote such a tome. Yet there are many stories that will never be heard or understood if heard. Each of us is unique in our own struggle with polio. Today, for me, working through all of the issues of being a handicap girl in the 50's is time consuming but healing. What will my story say to my children and grandchildren, my friends? Was my struggle easy? What is it like today compared to my early life, living with a handicap? And thus to my feelings today of non-belonging etc.?
I am not a complainer! I deal with what I have today. I do get angry and sad and upset! Hold a lot inside. Wanting to express myself to the world and unfold what is inside to be positive to feel empowered to live this life. I have more to do in this life. I do not know what that is exactly. I have come a long way in working with my disability to the extent that many of my friends do not consider me disabled. Especially since we are all getting older and have our own set of challenges. So I want my voice to be heard, my story told so that .........WHAT? Maybe it is so I accept myself and my own struggles! I will explore more so that I can feel confident when I have to extend myself in public life. I do know that the older I become the more reclusive I become. This has a lot to do with the amount of energy it takes to just go to the grocery store; and the need to remembering the summers of heat, swimming pools, cool libraries, sitting in a wagon and being taken to the Ice Cream Store, the butcher shop where I got dill pickles from a barrel, and coming home to read Nancy Drew mystery's. Not too bad! But alone.